We're not as divided as we think we are
Written by emily swartzlander
As a communicator, I spend a lot of time thinking about how to help our partners create the right messages to reach the right audiences. My goal, always, is helping child and family focused organizations show how their work and their mission align with their audiences’ values and goals.
Right now, that seems like an extra tough thing to do. It feels impossible to read the news or scroll social media without feeling like our country is divided beyond hope, with no chance of finding common ground.
And yet… what if the narrative that our country is divided beyond hope isn't the full picture? What if we’re not nearly as divided as we think?
Research from multiple sources (highlighted here by the Carnegie Corporation of New York) shows the American public – our communities themselves – are less polarized than our political leaders. In fact, research shows that political leaders tend to encourage polarization by amplifying it.
We’re more united than we think.
The truth is, there’s surprising and sustained agreement across the political spectrum on a wide range of issues. Here are a few examples:
June research from Child Care Aware of America shows that 81 percent of parents say that expanding access to affordable, quality child care should be a top or high priority for both federal and state policymakers.
74 percent of parents think funding for child care and early learning should increase.
Regardless of whether they identify as a Republican or Democrat, the majority of Americans are concerned about the future of our country.
Nearly three in four Americans are worried about the state of democracy, according to a poll last month from NPR/PBS News. (We’re stress eating together, y’all.)
More than two thirds of Americans say the cost of healthcare is one of their top national concerns.
And a June 2025 Gallup poll shows that a record 79 percent of Americans believe immigration is good for our country.
So, as communicators, how do we harness the values that unite us instead of letting our differences divide us?
let’s break the spiral of silence.
The Spiral of Silence theory describes a stark mismatch between what people believe and what they think others believe. It’s a vicious cycle:
People mistakenly think their views are in the minority, so they stay silent.
This silence makes more people with the same views assume their viewpoint is less popular, which in turn leads those people to stay quiet, too.
Basically, it’s a feedback loop. Here’s an example of how this plays out:
Earlier this year, the Berkley Media Studies Group released research that shows that while more than 80 percent of U.S. residents support diversity, equity and inclusion, they mistakenly believe only 55 percent of people agree with them.
That’s a 25-point gap in perception.
The fear of being the lone voice, or the fear of being judged, causes people to censor themselves. And the silence then makes us believe we’re more divided than we are.
here’s how to break harmful spirals.
The good news is that we can disrupt the Spiral of Silence and replace it with a cycle of shared purpose and hope. Here’s how:
Stop amplifying division. As communicators, we must make a conscious choice to lead with consensus when the data supports it. Our messaging should highlight the 80 percent who agree, not the 20 percent who don't. We need to tell stories that showcase cooperation and common values, not conflict.
Focus on shared values. According to the FrameWorks Institute, we should connect our work to universal human needs, like the desire for a healthy family or a better future for our children. (If you’d like us to help you tailor your messaging to your audiences, we’re happy to help.)
Make the political personal. We need to connect the dots between big-picture issues and people's everyday lives. Instead of talking about abstract policies, we must show how a lack of child care access impacts a parent's ability to work and provide for their family. (Here are some great storytelling tips to help make your case.)
Give advocates a clear, simple message to share. Empower your advocates and trusted messengers by providing simple, clear and non-confrontational language to use when they share about your work. (Here’s our resource on how to write for your community.)
The Spiral of Silence is a powerful force that makes us all feel more alone and more divided than we are. But as leaders and communicators, we have the power to break it. By focusing on what unites us, we can help our advocates find their true voice and inspire our audiences to take action, regardless of who they voted for in 2024.
